Visions in Times of Depression
Project info

I present to you a series full of silence and introspection, unified by theme and chromatic view. The game of colors, shapes and textures in my series emphasizes the emotions and experiences behind the photographs, the metaphorical meaning, the power of metamorphosis of my emotions, the ultimate refuse to capture the obvious, but to capture lines, lights and shadows, compositions, spaces and chromatics that do complement each other in a seamless will to transmit a symbolical and metaphorical message, pushing the viewer to read the meaning behind every composition. I seek to offer meaning and to control every space and color stain in my photographs for them to become enough symbolical and almost perfect translators of my emotions' trends. My tendency to give an abstract and pictorial style to my compositions is a sort of refuge to me.

These 10 photographs form a sub-series of a larger series regarding the documentation and observational process of my way of seeing things during my depression. Thus, this series becomes a series of experimental photography combined with symbolism, shades of abstraction and an observational process during certain stages of a personal depression. There are certain things which I can observe as being different during such a psychic disturbance: the presence of some elements which in real life may not be there at all - thus the real image being combined with previous visions I've had, allowed me to form individual compositions through photography. Thus, this sub-series came out to be full of symbolic elements such as: sources of light, reflections, cubes, roads, blurriness, specific pink-green chromatics and others.

The open spaces and the roads have a symbolic meaning: the migration from an idea to another and also a choice and an option for which I do not reveal the end, but rather it engages one's imagination by entering the dark path or the opened space in order to seek a solution and an answer to the ups and downs of my depression. The road is symbolic alongside a reed which may come as a migrating thought through the idea of escape and freedom. Here, the road becomes open to interpretation and thought-provoking, because there are no crossroads, but only a constant path with the necessity to answer where it leads.

In photographs there is a symbolic source of light which might reflect the power of a state of mind (in this case depression) to transform itself in art, to take a true form of art and thus to transform also its creator. The source of light is present somehow in any of the photographs becoming another link element, alongside with the chromatic and theme choice. There is an antithesis and a paradox between light and darkness, between good and evil, the symbolism of light and darkness. The light becomes a sort of presence, a metaphor for guidance and hope. Darkness reflects the ambiguity and tension of this plain psychic state of mind. But if there is light there is direction, there is hope, there is a sort of reality and truth. In general, aggravated depression is multifaceted, such as a cube, generating multiple visions such as shadows and reflections which give the idea of an Alter Ego in such state of mind, and a dual presence also reflected by the darkness-light antithesis. In a concealed darkness I struggle to release the light as a source of hope.

The versatility of the photographic medium of this series (Polaroid, 35 mm film, digital) and also the pictorial shades I believe they present a better portraying of the possibility of "translating" depression into art, offering it a sort of a lyrical and poetic expression. Some of the photographs gain cinematic look in accordance with those lived visions during my depression. The plants as source of regeneration, life and multitude of options, the source of light, the reflections, the shadows, the multiple faces of the cubes become metaphor for an Alter Ego, the wires as means of connections, the warm pink and cold green, they are all coming together to reveal my way of seeing the world in times of a personal psychic disturbance, when I still appeal to both logic and plasticity. There are no clear contours, the blurriness of the compositions is seeked in order to give the photographs a sense of Timeless, there is nothing certain, all is induced and thus becoming lyrical and much more fluid which gives a sense of liberty and movement to the imagination and thought.

The chromatics offers a bold aesthetic approach and a peculiar plasticity to the series due to the unconventional pair of used colors: pink and green. The pair gives a sort of a mystery but also a calmness to the series. Somehow pink and green combination manages to maintain life on the first place. Pink and green are the only ones able to form a cube in a total darkness alongside the eternal white light. The antithesis warm-cold (pink-green) emotionally moves the viewer back and forth. Everything is amplified due to the black and white antithesis also. If there is darkness and blurriness, there is also a counteraction with the sources of light and the chromatic game as hope. So, there are questions, but also concealed answers. There is all about observing and finding myself and also offering the viewer the possibility to engage their imagination and to apply the logic-symbolism to make connections from a photograph to another and link the meanings and plasticity all together.

There could be a poetic visual narrative connection between the photographs also: it all starts with Towering - the source of acknowledgement and pride, undergoing the Burning of it all, and again with a rebirth from the ashes of a new pair of shadows and so on.