The Past

Currently I am 36 years old. One day is enough time to look back on your past. If I die in old age, one day will still be enough time, even if I look back on my past. I think that when we look back on our past, we think of something big happening in our lives, when we were absorbed in something. So I don't remember much when I was crazy and not living, and I'm probably unconsciously excluding such things from myself. What I remember when I look back on the past is that, for some reason, I took a picture of myself with a camera every day. I think there are a lot of photos at night, and I think that I can feel myself because it was at night when there were less people than at daytime. I don't really like to look back on the past. However, the moment you take a picture, it becomes the past, so when you look at the picture, you look back on the past. It's almost like listening to music I used to listen to. When I look at the photos from these days, I get a lot of emotions within me, but I can feel my addiction. I think self-portrait is a testament to when I am desperate.