The Undiscovered Self

One morning, over a year ago, I awoke compelled to photograph myself, something I’m seldom, if ever, inclined to do. In this era where the selfie has become the most ubiquitous and banal of photographic forms, an artist can’t help but dismiss it as not art. And yet the idea I had, which I couldn’t shake, was to turn my gaze onto myself, to use the lens as a kind of psycho-spiritual instrument to explore what lies beyond the surface. For as long as I can remember, I have been preoccupied by the question of what constitutes the self. Seeking for answers led me from Western philosophy and psychology to metaphysics and Eastern mysticism. One theme that unites these seemingly disparate paths is an understanding that the self goes beyond the ego, the senses and the physical body, and the possibility that there is not merely one self, but many. This photographic series attempts to move outside the bounds of traditional portraiture to reveal the mystery and multiplicity that lies within us all. What are we when we look beyond our self-image, our body, our mind, beyond who we think we are and what we might know? And can the camera, which ordinarily captures images of things as they are on the exterior, help us penetrate deeper? To suggest that the subject is more than what he or she seems, and to encourage the viewer to confront subtle, disquieting or unknowable dimensions of self, I use the surrealistic technique of double exposure. To find and juxtapose compositions directly in camera, I spend hours with my subjects, which gives each photo an intimacy that teases out hidden facets, fears and fantasies, and opens up intriguing lines of inquiry. There is no photoshopping involved, and I use only available lighting, usually shoot in the subject’s home, and process the images in Adobe Lightroom. By giving myself these limitations, I can approach my theme in a more direct way, eschewing the artifice of easy digital image manipulation for something more pure yet mysterious.