A POSTCARD FROM NOW

Through years I have learned not to see. I ran away while all I wanted was to run towards her. I hated the self that endured. And now I wanted to see. I went to places that hold the imprint of annihilation of the child. There was a liveliness I wasn’t aware of. As if different versions of her, from different pasts, were all there all at once. She has now turned the page. She says that now she looks at life differently. I struggle getting to now. The price is high – it takes leaving the past in the past. Now is the place I want to write you this postcard from. Whenever you are. We made it together. - 1992-1994 Yugoslavia suffered from one of the longest hyper-inflations in the world economic history. Prolonged existential struggle led to a generalized degradation of health. Milan’s father died of a stroke. His mother progressively slipped into what would become a psychotic depression. She is now fully recovered. Traumatic memory, dissociated from time, repeatedly presents itself thus forcing the individual to experience the present as if it were identical to the past. Pursuing recovery, the narrative power of memory is regained, revealing a truth of contradictions in the present