I Am Here But Why?

At this moment I just had done my first solo show and invested so much time and money into my personal work. Although I don’t want to renounce the people that came and showed interest but the outcome was largely disappointing and made me question if I should continue this investigation of the self. Although I benefit from the dutch funding landscape I still want to pay for daily life myself and only invest the funding in realising the work. This takes time. In my head only when I can make enough money producing autonomous work, I should persuit this aspect only and could call it my job and myself an artist. It’s a stupid thought in a way, I know. Well. I am wandering off. I didn’t want to do anything with art anymore and wanted to quit the gallery thing and focus on making money only. For six months I couldn’t make any new work until my head became too troubled and I realised that if I wanted to keep things interesting and challenging I had to invest in what was keeping me busy in my head. In the end it calms me down to speak and tell stories (be outspoken) through my work. That’s how this series of selfportraits came about. You choose to be in one place but the next one will whistle and tell you it’s better over there. While in the end the place where you are is the place you need to be. All you need is you. It was a starting point so hopefully the work is open enough for you to dive into and hope there’s some water in.