are you at peace?

On October 29, 2022, more than a hundred young people were crushed to death in the streets of Itaewon, South Korea. The next morning in the Netherlands, I woke to images of bodies on a street I had once walked, while people outside biked peacefully. Since then, my world has felt split into two. This is about remote collective trauma, drawn from my personal experience. Being far from the source of tragedy does not allow escape. I was here, yet also there, or perhaps not here at all, but only there. Moving between the present and memories from early childhood, this series explores the recurring nature of national tragedy. It traces the history of Korea through periods of colonisation and invasion, and examines the relationship between historical violence and generational trauma, until it arrives at the origin of pain. In Korea, tofu is given to those released from jail as both a warning and a plea to live clean. I continue to eat the tofu, feeling trapped by the pain of these tragedies, no matter where I am. This generational trauma is stacked upon the last, passed down, inherited. Where does pain come from? Where could it go? I wish I could have stood with them. I wish I could have fully escaped.